So, I have completely dried up. :( *sigh* SO SAD. I have tried and tried this week to keep up the breastfeeding, but I just have absolutely no milk left. Even today I was trying unsuccessfully to feed, though it had been three whole days since she had gotten anything from me, and I knew in my heart we were done. I really am sad about it, but obviously it's beyond my control. New Baby must need my resources more. I'm trusting God with it and thanking Him for the blessing of being able to nurse Rosemary for eight whole months. I feel blessed to have had that experience. And I can't wait to have it with #5!! I heart breastfeeding!!!
The good news is, I pumped a lot in the beginning and kept my milk in the deep freeze. So I have several weeks' worth of breast milk to give her before we have to go to formula. Also, Rosie loves the bottle. It's a lot faster than me. :)
Selfishly I am not looking forward to having to make bottles again. Breastfeeding is just so convenient! It's always ready, always the right temperature. Rosie's diaper bag has been so light- just a couple diapers and wipes. Also it's been so nice if she wakes up at night to just bring her in bed with me and lay her beside me, latch her on and go back to sleep. I hope we'll still cuddle a lot. I'll make sure that we do. :)
I'm already praying for Baby #5. . . that he/she will grow healthy and strong in my womb and arrive not a day before his/her birthday; that he/she and I will have a wonderful, thriving nursing relationship that will grow him/her big and strong and can last a whole 12 months. Praying for Rosemary that she will transition easily into being bottlefed and our bond will still be strong. Praying for me that I won't worry or fear throughout this pregnancy but will have a peace that passes understanding from trusting God for His best.